Written by If you agree with these words, please copy them, and send them on by email, or blog them. All copyright waved (just in case you’re the sort of person who wouldn’t want to do anything illegal.) So here we are, people, with a crack-down on online obscenity. By obscenity, we mean anything assumed to be [...]
READ MORE »Posts in category Erotic Power Xchange
Humiliation
Humiliation can be a significant part of a BDSM scenario. But how does that work? What does humiliation achieve? That it reinforces the power exchange is fairly obvious, but there is potentially more to it. Let’s skim over the power exchange aspect first. The Dom has the right, the power and the opportunity to humiliate [...]
READ MORE »Doms and Bullies
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If the submissions we sometimes have to reject, and the blurbs we see from other people’s books are anything to go by, a lot of people do not know what the differences are between a Dom and a bully. Power exchange is about power, obviously, but it’s also about trust. That’s a two way thing, not [...]
READ MORE »Emotional Safewords
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Love isn’t easy. We all know that. In a committed relationship with a long-term partner, we know there are ups and downs. There are days when we’re madly in love, there are days of ambivalence, and there are even those days of anger and frustration. Of course, everybody’s love life is different, but there are [...]
READ MORE »Raceplay
While humiliation isn’t an essential element of BDSM or power exchange scenarios, it’s also not unusual. For a significant number of people, shame and submission go hand in hand, and there’s a unique sexual thrill that comes from being put down in just the right way. Or from dishing that out. For people who aren’t [...]
READ MORE »Sex, Power and Ravishment
Following up on the blog post about ravishment, I wanted to explore what ravishment fantasies are and how they work, and what bothers me about them. Often called ‘rape fantasies’ (with all the problems that creates) the gist of a ravishment scene is that although the person in it (usually female) does not consent, they [...]
READ MORE »Ravishment
Talking about rape fiction, both here and on one of the loveyoudivine egroups, brought up some interesting points. There are folks out there with ‘rape fantasies’ and there are BDSM scenarios in which people consent, in advance, to something which is then played out in the style of a forced encounter. The problem with calling [...]
READ MORE »What did you consent to?
When you buy a book, you have certain expectations. The heat rating and content warning will inform those, especially if you’re exploring the murky waters of alternative erotica and bdsm fiction. Romance publishers do not touch rape fiction, because it isn’t nice. Most stipulate up front that they won’t even consider it. However, what they [...]
READ MORE »Prison Boy Toy
As an editor, Cain Berlinger’s recent release, Prison Boy Toy, created some serious challenges. It’s a very fine piece of dark, bdsm erotica exploring power exchange, forced seduction, humiliation and revenge between gay prisoners in a Moroccan jail. The problem was finding I had to edit out something which in many ways compromised the integrity [...]
READ MORE »Full Time BDSM?
From the BDSM fiction out there, you could be forgiven for thinking that most people in D/s relationships do it full time. There is no shortage of stories about total ownership, and folks who live as slaves in the Master or Mistress’s house. It’s offered, frequently, as the BDSM ideal. But is it a realistic [...]
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