Risk Taking
Thursday, June 3rd, 2010
While at first glance risk taking may seem a milder kink than voyeurism or exhibitionism, it’s also a more complicated one. The voyeur consciously enjoys looking. The exhibitionist takes a knowing delight in showing off. The risk taker gets kicks from uncertainty, possibility and getting away with it.
Risk takers have sex in situations where they might get caught and get a kick out of doing so. That is, I think, the difference between people who are kinky about possibly being caught, and people who are horny and get it on despite the risk.
Dalia Craig’s Weathering The Storm offers a perfect example of the latter – two women who are so into each other they can’t wait, but who are very nearly caught by some passersby. The scene mixes excitement with a fear of humiliation and there’s a mixed emotional response – relief in having got away with it, and self consciousness because it could have gone very wrong.
My tale Tight, Dark Places includes two guys having sex on a balcony – one of whom is a deliberate risk taker, getting a kick out of possibly being caught. They are visible, but it’s not obvious that they’re fucking. Remaining in control enough not to let on what’s happening can be part of the thrill and the danger of such a scene.
Cheri Crystal has a number of stories about risk takers. Risky Pursuit offers a scenario where two women go climbing in order to have sex in a rather public and hazardous place. Here the risk of discovery blends with the physical danger to create an adrenaline high. Mile High Dare, as the title suggests, involves the possibility of sex on a plane – a fantasy for many people. The risk is deliberately sought, but the audience is not. It’s an interesting blend of wanting, and not wanting to be seen.
So what is risk taking about? It’s clearly not about showing off and being seen. Risk takers often make efforts not to be caught. Is it the sense of getting away with it? The thrill of doing something a bit taboo without getting caught? For people who get a kick out of being humiliated, the risk/possibility of humiliation adds spice to an encounter. Imagined shame that does not actually occur, has its own peculiar allure.
Risk taking comes in many shapes and forms. How risky an activity seems depends on how private you are. I’ve encountered guys who claim they can’t get it up at all with someone aside from their partner in the house. You might risk being overheard and disturbed, or having the neighbours know what you are doing (approximately). Some people get a kick out of suspecting that others can hear them.
It might be about finding a secret place where you hope not to be interrupted. As someone who likes to play outside, I’ve a fair amount of experience of that. There, the pleasure lies entirely in getting away with it. Then there are those who court risk, barely hidden – like a rather startled couple I encountered in a Birmingham park one day who clearly hadn’t expected a whole grove of druids to come ambling out of the trees… but who carried on regardless! Some people get more thrills for being closer to getting caught. It’s all about what happens inside your head – the fantasy of a sexy voyeur, or a public humiliation without the reality of dealing with any real complications. It puts an edge on things, an urgency that gets the blood pumping, and for some people that’s a real turn on.
Are you longing for a new, hot tale from Cheri Crystal? 
